AFTER WEEKS OF SPECULATION AS TO HOW SHE GOT THEM SO TASTY, ANDY'S MAM LET SLIP HER LITTLE SECRET.

THAT'S PROBABLY NEIGH GOOD FOR US MIND...

CHUFFED TO MEET STAN LAUREL BOB ASKED HIS HERO ;

''WELL, WHAT HAVE YOU BROUGHT ME?''

'I'VE BROUGHT HARD BOILED EGGS AND NUTS''.........

PETE'S 'GO GO GADGET' BACKDROP LEG EXTENSIONS CAME IN USEFUL AT TIMES..

BOB MANAGED TO SIGN UP TWO NEW MEMBERS  FOR HIS 'DAFT HAT ON A DAFT HEED' CLUB..

A NEW DRUMSTICK ARRIVED FOR CHRISTMAS........

IT MUST BE MINE, IT'S GOT ME NAME ON.....

IT REALLY IS AN IRISH BAR.... :o

TALK ABOUT WELL BEHAVED, WE NEVER HEARD A PEEP OUT OF A SINGLE ONE OF THESE BUDGIES, BUT THE STATE OF THE CARPET UNDERNEATH WAS SOMETHING ELSE MIND..............

SOMETIMES A CAPTION IS JUST NOT REALLY NECESSARY.....

THE CROQUET LAWN SUFFERED A SPOT OF MINOR DAMAGE OUTSIDE RAYS PLACE.........

Q..AND WHAT TYPE OF QUALITIES DO YOU HAVE APART FROM THE ABILITY TO QUAFF GALLONS OF TEA?

A..ERRR.....ORCHESTRAL MANOUVERES IN THE DARK...?

NO... HANG ON......ELO?

JLS?

JUST ONE SUGAR!!!!

TIME FOR A SPOT OF 'SUPERMAN' ANTICS AT THE END OF THE NIGHT.

OH DEAR, PETE SEEMS TO HAVE OVERWORKED HIS SMILE MUSCLES AGAIN.......

DID YOU GO FISHING IN THAT HAT BOB? HOW BIG WAS THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY?

OH JUST A TIDDLER THEN.....

AMAZING HOW A BLUE CAP TRANSFORMS THE DRUMMIST INTO HARRY ENFIELDS ANNOYING 'ONLY MEEEEEEEE' GADGY....

YOU DON'T WANNA PLAY DRUMS LIKE THAT, YOU WANNA DO IT LIKE THIS ETC...

YOU DINNA WANNA..............

BEFORE GOING ONSTAGE AS WIDOW TWANKY BOB NEEDED A DROP OF DUTCH COURAGE. LUCKY FOR HIM HE'D HIDDEN HIS FAVOURITE TIPPLE - TOILET DUCK - UNDER HIS PANTO DAME SKIRT.....

HE'S BEHIIIIIIIIIIIIND YOOOOOOOOOOOU!!

NEVER MIND YA PHONE NICK, TURN THE LEEETS ON!!

CAN YOU FIND MY KING EDWARD CIGAR SOMEBODY?

BET THEY ARE ROCK HARD......

WE GET POSTERS PRINTED, SEND THEM OUT TO PUBS. AND WHEN WE GET THERE  FIND THEY'VE TURNED THEM OVER AND MADE THEIR OWN ON THE BACK OF OURS! QUALITY MIND!

A WHILE BACK SOMEONE TOLD PETE AND JOHNA THEY'D BE GREY AND OLD IN A BAND CALLED THE DUSTY TOOLS.......

THE BAZOOKA WAS LOCKED AND LOADED AND ABOUT TO BE POINTED AT CLIFFS HEAD..

SO THAT'S WHERE JJ'S HAIR GEL WENT........HIS HALLOWEEN CAT!

PEOPLE OFTEN ASK HOW WE CHILL AFTER A GIG. THIS PARTICULAR NIGHT WE HEADED TO THE RIVER WITH A FEW BOTTLES AND ADMIRED THE HUGE SHIP IN FOR MAINTENANCE AT 1.20AM - WE WERE ALREADY FULL OF PIE OF COURSE.....NOT PARTICULARLY FUNNY FOR THIS PAGE - BUT THAT'S ACTUALLY WHAT WE DID AFTER A SLEEPERS GIG.

BOBBY ALWAYS WORE A SAFETY HARNESS WHEN POLE DANCING IN CASE HE FELL BACKWARDS ONTO HIS BEER........

GUINNESS.

IT'S GOOD FOR US! 

CRIBBAGE THIS YEAR ANYONE?

ANYONE? ANYONE AT ALL??

SURE?

THAT'LL BE A NO THEN.........

JUST HOW COMPLICATED IS BINGO THEN?

WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY USING FOR FERTILISING CARROTS THESE DAYS???

UNBELIEVABLE!!!

MRS B EXCELLED HERSELF AT THE WEEKEND!! IT WAS AS LUSH AS IT LOOKS!!

BOB WAS PREPARING FOR PANTO SEASON EARLY, DETERMINED TO PLAY WIDOW TWANKY AT THE CUSTOMS HOUSE...

GILLIGILLIOSSENPEPPERGATSONELLENBOGLE BY THE SEA,EE,EE,EE,EE!! OR SUMMAT......

CLIFF INVITED THE LADS ROUND HIS FOR A PLEASANT EVENING OUT IN THE GARDEN.....

HAWAY BOBBY HOPE, JOIN IN AND PULL A FACE LIKE THE REST OF THE LADS...OH YOU ARE, SORRY.... 

THAT'S A PINT OF PIMMS, NO WONDER ANDY NEEDS A LIE DOWN.

 

DON'T LET HIM FOOL YOU THAT HE DOES A BIT.

IT'S HIS AGE APPARENTLY........

''HEY, NOT SO MUCH OF THE OLD!''

 

LOOKAH, Y'AL ATTA GAN IN THERE 'COS THUZ NEE ROOM IN THE FRONT....NO, NO - NOT THAT YET, IT'S THE BASS BINS FIRST...ETC

LIGHTSMAN ANDY STRIKES A POSE WITH ONE OF HIS PRIZE BLOOMS....... WHAT'S HE USING FOR FERTILISER? CAN'T JUST BE CARLING?? THEY'LL BE BRICKING IT AT THE SILKSWORTH COMRADES LEEK AND FLOWER SHOW WHEN HE TURNS UP....

 

MEANWHILE.......

'ERE... CAN YOU TELL IF I LIKE BUTTER?

A THORN BETWEEN TWO BUTTERCUPS...

 SO WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF A BIRD PAPPED ON YER HAND?

I WOULDN'T TAKE HER OUT AGAIN.....

ANY VOLUNTEERS TO PUT THIS IN THE VAN, OR SHALL WE HAVE A BEER?

 

ANDY'S MAM KNOCKED UP A CRACKING PIE AT THE WEEKEND.

WE HAVEN'T QUITE WORKED OUT WHO IT WAS FOR IN PARTICULAR YET THOUGH.....

HMMMMMMMMM........

TASTED LUSH ANYHOW! NICE ONE MRS B!

 BOB WAS WELL IMPRESSED WITH PETE'S SPARE ROOM......

...BUT WAS LESS THAN CHUFFED AT HIS NEW SEATING ARRANGEMENTS IN THE VAN..

280's BASS SUPREMO JAMES IS STUMPED HOW TO GET  ALL THAT TRUSS INTO THE VAN. NO GOOD RELYING ON TOUGHY MATE.....

A RARE SHOT OF THESE TWO ACTUALLY DOING A BIT...

AFTER A LONG NIGHTS DRINKING HE LIKES TO KEEP HIS LINES CLEAN...........

ATOMIC WHAT? LIZ WHO? NAH SORRY PET, WE'VE NEVER HEARD OF YOU, AND CAN'T THINK OF A GOOD REASON TO USE A BLONDE FEMALE BACKING SINGER . PLUS YOU'RE BETTER LOOKING THAN THE BLOKE WE'VE GOT AND HE'LL ONLY TAKE A HUFF...

BIT OF A COME DOWN AFTER THE STADIUM OF LIGHT GIG FOR GARY BARLOW AND CO, AND CHEAPER TICKETS TOO!?

TRIFLE OR A MERINGUE?

NOR YER REET - AL 'AVE THE TRIFLE.....ETC

JOHNA CIRCA 1985 - 'TRACK TO THE TOP' COMPETITION AT LANCASTRIAN SUITE  FED BREWERY, WITH 'MIND OVER MATTER'.

YEP, IT WAS LONG AND BLONDE ONCE UPON A TIME....

TJ DOYLES OWNER DERMOT AGREED TO A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF GUINNESS TO THE TOOLS FOR A PIC ON THE WEBSITE. HOORAH! ....AND THRICE HUZZAR!!

HE'S PROBABLY FORGOTTEN THAT NOW THOUGH...

WHAT.

THE.

:)

NOTICED HOW MUCH YOUR ELECTRIC BILL IS LATELY??

MISSUS, IT'S TIME TO TRIM YOUR BUSH.

LOOK NO HANDS!!

THE BASIL FAWLTY MOTIVATION METHOD WAS ALWAYS A LAST RESORT TO GET TOUGHY STAGEREADY.

THERE'S ALWAYS ONE GRAFFITI ARTIST IN EVERY VENUE....

TWO BOB.

JUST ABOUT WHAT THEY'RE WORTH!

QUICK AS A WHAT????

RIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH - YOU'RE ALREADY PLAYING BETTER THAN ME, GIZ ME STICKS BACK!!

...TEACHING KIDS DRUMS PUT YEARS ON CLIFF, HE SHRUNK, HIS EYESIGHT DETERIORATED - BUT THE GOOD NEWS WAS HIS HAIR CAME BACK!

EDDIE SCOTT - CONCERT CHAIRMAN AND GENIAL HOST AT HEATON BURRRFS CLURRRB, WHAT A FRONTMAN - HE WAS ACTUALLY OUR FIRST CHOICE SINGER, BUT COULDN'T PLAY BASS AS WELL UNFORTUNATLEY...

...HOGEY HAD A GO - MUCH BETTER BASSIST BUT COULDN'T SING..

..EVEN CLIFF HAD A BASH, BUT FELT HE WAS LACKING JJ'S SPECIAL 'DEEK MIRRORBALLS'.

WE GOT THIS.......

BOBBY'S BUSY BACKSTAGE KEEPING IT ALL SPICK AND SPAN - TATTYFILARIOUSLY PLUMTIOUS!

ALWAYS NICE TO HAVE A TOILET IN THE DRESSING ROOM MIND - JUST IN CASE YOU'VE BEEN ON THIS STUFF....

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED - NOT FUNNY, JUST HOT!

DRIVEWAY GREASE STAINS!!!? WOOF!

TOP TOOL FAN AND ALL ROUND LIVE MUSIC LOVER EXTRAORDINAIRE, STEVE ANGUS - AKA FISHWICK - FAILED THE BACKDROP ROADIE TEST MISERABLY AT THE OFFICE, SHIELDS.. BLOODY USELESS!!

NOT ONLY DOES HE HAVE A MALICIOUS REPUTATION FOR  NOT LIFTING MUCH GEAR - BOB ACTUALLY HAS HIS OWN PERSONAL STAIRCASE ROADIE, HANDY FOR HEATON BUFFS, STEELS ETC. HIS KNEES AREN'T WHAT THEY USED TO BE..

INCREDIBLE HOW A PAIR OF BORROWED GLASSES TRANSFORMS CLIFF INTO CHATTY MAN ALAN CARR!!

DEEK THE JUICE CIRCA 1993 - YOUNG PETE..

 AND HIS PARTNER IN CRIME, HAHAHAHAHAHA - LOVELY HAIR JOHNA...

NICE CLURRRRB MIRROR!

....AND A NORMAL CLURRRB MIRROR. IT'S A MYTH THAT THEY HAVE LIGHT BULBS AROUND THEM..

PETE'S TURN TO COWP AT THE WEEKEND ON THIS VICIOUS NAIL, USED TO APPLY A FLOOR TILE APPARENTLY- WELL WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU USE?! FORTUNATELY NO GUINNESS WAS SPILT. ANY EXCUSE FOR A LIE DOWN WITH HIM MIND. 'HELLO? IS THAT CLAIMSDIRECT?'

FROM L TO R; BOB, JOHNA, CLIFF (CAME OUT FRONT FROM THE KIT FOR THE PIC - NOTE THE WIG SLIPPAGE) AND PETE.

KEBIJES...

ANYONE GOT A WET FINGER TO SEE IF THIS IS STILL LIVE?

POIROT, CHAPLIN, CHARLIE CAROLLI,  AND ..........SUPERMARIO HIMSELF.  ALL DUE TO TOO MUCH GUINNESS (AGAIN) AT THE PHILADELPHIA.

ERRRM... NO THANKS!

READYBREK HELPED FEND OFF THE COLD

IN THE BUFFALOS ROCK OLD DRESSING ROOM.

HOW ABOUT THIS TONIGHT LADS? THANKFULLY NOT!

BOBBY SCUFFED ONE OF THE QUEEN ANNE'S FOLLOWING A SLIGHT COWP.. THANKFULLY THE VARNISH WASN'T TOO BADLY DAMAGED, BUT THE SCRAPE DID SHOW HIS SUSPECT 'LIZARD' ORIGINS. LOOK CAREFULLY AND YOU CAN SEE THE SCALES UNDERNEATH.

......FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING, MIND YOU IT IS ONLY A LIGHTING STAND.

....BUT  BURB HAPPILY ACCEPTS AN AWARD FOR ACTUALLY HUMPING SOME GEAR...

PAUL AND JODIE, NOT ONLY BETTER LOOKING - BUT BETTER PLAYERS TOO!

PETE PUT HIS SCARY EYES IN FOR HALLOWEEN..

MATTY AND MAUREEN - SIMPLY THE BEST, WHAT A NIGHT!!

CLUBLAND. YES, IT'S THE LAW, BUT IT STILL HAS TO BE SANCTIONED BY THE COMMITTEE.....

UTILITY TOOL AND ROCK SOLID SINGER CJ WINS THE

BUFFALOS BACKSTAGE GURNING COMPETITION.

 CLOSE SECOND TOUGHY!

 PULL A FACE BOBBY!!! OH YOU HAVE...

NICE PIERRE!

OH GOD.....CAPTAIN PUGWASH, THROUGH THE PORTHOLE.

LOOKS LIKE A MOOMIN!!

NURRRSE!!!! BRING THE DEFIBRILLATOR!!!

WHATS THE............................

NO - EVEN WE WOULDN'T DRINK IT..........

THIS WAY TO THE BAR BOYS, WE'VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU.

NOT THE WORST GRAFFITI WE'VE SEEN IN CLUBS....

POLITE NOTICE ON GRINDON CLUBS BOILER.

GOT THE BEERS MAAATE!  OOH LAAVERLY...

LEO SAYER COMBINED BEING A PCSO DURING THE DAY AND BUSKING WITH HIS BEATEN UP GUITAR.

Cliff has always been brought up well he always picks his nose

in private !!

Nicely pressed shirt Johna shame ya jeans look

like you've been pickin potatos in them !! Its that

bleedin 'Rick' again. Got nicked from van outside

The Zeba Indian on Hylton Rd !! We all got out the van

pi**ed went in for a curry and left the bleedin van wide open.

Needless to say no more 'Rick'. Then again they would never

have nicked me kit !! (See next few photees)

How embarrassing is this !!!!!! What the F**k is the visor about !!

Looks like i've been cleaning the potatos with my towel too !!!

And notice i used some top quality cymbal stands!!

 

Mind we had a mega lighting rig !!  A bloody inspection lamp with tin foil wrapped around it with a red bulb in it !!!!

Could have done with puttin clean shoes on too !!  Hahahaha

Grindon Community Centre 1981 we think !! About 18 yrs old ish.

Struth good job we can laugh at each other !!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!    Matron

Ralfie fron Grindon Cluuuuurb!!!!!!!!!!!

This is extremely disturbing and should have an 18 certificate !!!

Must Be a copy That Rick ??? Sure i saw one like that lyin against an Indian Take away in Hylton Rd !!! How bizzarre that the gaffa tape on the right hand bass drum appears to join to the monitior !!!!

Johna must be giving the audience some of his patter cos Doz looks like ees off to sleep !!

Bobby has just got a new job at the post office as chief stamp licker !!

Bloody ell lads remind me not to have any of them pickled eggs again before we go on stage !!!!!!!!

Who's that dodgy lookin soundman ? Looks like a bit of a chutney Ferrett to me ? Is that the famous Bobby Tough in the front row admiring Doz's basies ?  'I really want to be like him when I grow up'. In fact I want his job !!!!!!!

Struth Cliff with hair !!!!!   Is he confused about something or farting ? Johna, a bleedin Hoover and the daft get is trying to play a bottom 'F' by the look of it ????  And what is it that Doz has hold of, a bleedin Fender floor mop !!!!

Nice Les Paul Pete. Shame about the small rodent on your top lip !!!!!!!!

Look like nice new jeans and trainers Johna ????????

What is this all about ????????? Knife and fork ??  Had Cliff just finished his tea ???????

Shear Khan The Grindon Mill circa 1981 ish i think. Johna on Bass, Cliff on drums and Doz on guitar. mega 80's adidas bag in shot !!!!

Fair play to Doz or should we say 'Zoro' for allowing us to put this one

up on site. Nothing much to say Doz mate except WHAT THE F**K !!

Most interesting use of the drum cases to support the WEM Copycat !!

Nice strat though bet that would be worth a few bob now !!

After giving me permission to use these photos Doz was quoted as

saying 'I think the cape was something to do with Brian May but i av'nt

got a friggin clue what the hat is about' !!!!

Zoro shreads !!!!!  Look at those lush flock curtains and a little peak at a quality PA system H/H 4 x 12 stacks. Absolute pure quality distortion at its best !!! Mind you they were the dogs bollocks in 1980 !!  

Nice shirt !!!!!!

I'm going to kill that monitor engineer if i can get hold of him !!!!!!!!

Kevin Webster from Corra !!!!!!!!!!!!

This is disturbing !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Before !!!!!!!!!

And after 12 pints of Stones !!!!!!!

This is also disturbing !!!!!!!!!!!

Pete allowed his guitar tech roadie Neil Schon in on this photo. Nice of him. Looks more like the Joker from Batman to me ????

Nice perm nice Mackintosh Bobby - and nice guy and player Mac !!!!!!!!!!!

Reasonably sensible...

.....not very sensible at all !!!!!!!!!!

Simmons bloody kit !!!!!!!!   I had to have one !!!!!!!!  Look at the bizarre way the snare mic stand is set up !!

Just so i can get me pint holder in gud position me thinx ???? Still got that and on stage with us now !!

Me old mucka Jim on bass !!!!!  Lookin young mate !!!!!!  Nice hair too. Now he looks like he's got a busted settee on his head !!!!!!!!!! Who as you can see by the next photo is now in discuise as the new French president Sarkozy !!!

Hahahahahahahahaha Jim our lights man!

There are some things that should just be done cos its reet !!